二十二

人生偶尔会走上一条陌路
像是没有指标的地图

Rantings

How do I begin? I've been flooded with disappointments recently and my spirit is crestfallen. I wanted to shout out loud that "I will survive!", but honestly, I need a little time to "grieve" over my plight before I could emerge from my sinking.

My life has been moving slow since I've been going through this ordeal. I have so much zeal and passion to strive for, but my current status quo hinder my move.

I'm not blaming God, or anyone for this. I have myself to blame, but would I be forgiven so that I could turn back the clock and make right of every wrongs I had made? But I know I've to be mature in shouldering the responsibility of my wrongs, and to learn from this journey. God, have I done enough to atone all my wrongs? How long and how much more do I need to walk on this self-discovery path?

I'm not seeking for a magician to change my current situation entirely, but I really hope there would be an insight or enlightenment that would lift me up and lead me to a path to somewhere.

How long more that this trauma has to be going? If it is your will that I sink; how deep you want me to be sunken and how long you want me to stay there?

Bro, lift me up, please!